Whole heart

Midlife is when the universe gently places her hands upon your shoulders, pulls you close, and whispers in your ear: I’m not screwing around. All of this pretending and performing—these coping mechanisms that you’ve developed to protect yourself from feeling inadequate and getting hurt—has to go. Your armor is preventing you from growing into your gifts. I understand that you needed these protections when you were small. I understand that you believed your armor could help you secure all of the things you needed to feel worthy and lovable, but you’re still searching and you’re more lost than ever. Time is growing short. There are unexplored adventures ahead of you. You can’t live the rest of your life worried about what other people think. You were born worthy of love and belonging. Courage and daring are coursing through your veins. You were made to live and love with your whole heart. It’s time to show up and be seen.

Brene Brown

This quote! It feels spot on.  If you have time to read the whole article linked in her name,  I highly recommend it.  it’s time to show down and pay attention cause I’m obviously pissing the universe off in some way!

We had an amazing last month and busy last week!

Our 3 different friend visits in the last month are now over.  They were so nourishing and it was amazing to be able to visit with all these lovely beings and they refilled our hearts! I’ve been missing a little bit of that irl connection. I seek it out less here after covid but it’s really nice to get a big dose of it. We have one booked in November,  who’s next?!

We also had friends over for dinner and a pup playdate on Wed and that was so nice! We’re so popular! 🩵In giving my update,  which they requested,  I mentioned my softening and being ready for a break. I said I just don’t want to waste the little time I have being miserable. He mentioned that alot of people could learn that from me. It meant alot.

I also met my first ‘Transitions” patient last week (a program for those that don’t quite qualify for hospice but have a terminal disease and need some help). She is so sweet.  She has early signs of dementia,  but is bubbly and full of life.  She couldn’t remember how many kids she had but smiled at the mention of them and talked about how great it was when the grandkids visit.  It really tugs at your heartstrings being there,  but I also saw her smile a lot and be really engaged,  so it felt worth it. I plan to visit weekly.

This weekend was just gorgeous.  We camped in the ochocos which are about 45 min away and it was incredible.

Zie and I hiked while Jeremy rode his bike and we made it to the top. It was a short but arduous climb. Afterwards we just sat around in our fancy camping chairs and relaxed while taking in the views. It was much needed. Check out the pictures!

Oh and just a reminder that if you are immunodeficient or just want to be safe,  go get the updated covid and flu shot! I got both of them last week with no major repercussions.