Finding our Way

“All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.” ~J.R.R. Tolkien

I came across this quote today and it felt fitting because my dad LOVED the Lord of the Rings books. Grief, I’m learning, continues to be a wild ride.

I do, however, feel that I’ve turned a corner, at least for the moment. This week has felt a little more spacious and less doomy.

I think it’s because we spent the weekend with our friends in their cabin in southern Colorado. It was beautiful, quiet, low stress, and full of connection and relaxation. We needed that. Thank you so much,  Mill-isons!

My trip home to PA was also really nourishing, getting to hug my mom and sister tight; and reminisce with my dad’s side of the family. It was just also interlaced with stressful moments, as you can imagine given the circumstances, and having to drive a rental car back and forth between everyone. In true Righino fashion, we had a reservation at a restaurant for 12 and 23 people showed up! Luckily we were able to pivot quickly and my brother-in-law made it all happen with pizza and a giant cooler full of beer at their house. Almost everyone made the 30 min trek to their house and it ended up being so much more fun and relaxed. Except maybe for my 15-year old niece, whom arrived home from the homecoming dance with the ENTIRE family there. LOL. Luckily, the universe was also on our side as both sets of flights were all on time, which was a huge blessing considering I keep hearing stories.

Upon coming back, we are just trying to re-settle into a routine that we never really established after moving here. Jeremy’s counterpart at work was hired and just started, so we’re hoping things calm down for him there. I am still waiting to hear if my work contract is being renewed. I have less than a month at this point, but they are ‘reviewing budgets’ so I’m in a holding pattern. I finally have the brain power back to apply to jobs, and submitted a couple yesterday.

I’m trying to still be gentle with myself and not force anything. I need insurance, especially with the ACA on the chopping block, but I am hopeful that doing what I can each day and trying not to stress about it until I absolutely have to, will work out in the end. Either way, it will end how it ends and I can only do what I can do.

I did get blood work and spoke with my Oregon endocrinologist. I didn’t know this, but apparently, with blood work in different states, there is room for interpretation with the order. Basically, blood work is not comparable apples to apples because she is not exactly sure how they tested it (this is maddening to me, but also good to know). Alas, my thyroglobulin went from 11.2 to 20 and my tsh went from 0.01 to 1.2; which she said is not terribly concerning considering but she does want to adjust my thyroid medication (again)! So now I have an even crazier schedule of 75 mcg most days of the month and 100mcg 6 days in a month. She also snail-mailed me a new order with written instructions for the lab and I will get those in Dec (or in November if my insurance is going to end). So hopefully we will have more to go on from that.

I do want to thank everyone for the cards, texts, and gifts! It was so amazing to see all the love and support come in with amazing quotes and kind words. I had aspired to be a plant person when we moved here and I received a few flowers that I’m trying real hard to keep alive (I did not inherit my mom’s green thumb and tend to kill everything). I also received a wind chime from a mystery sender, which I love! Thank you so much to everyone.

I finished up a 3-session coaching package today and I’m really inspired to move forward with that again. I have been making slow but steady progress on my new website, so hopefully this will be my last full blog on wordpress! I’ve moved over all the subscribers so please keep watch on your email and I’ll let you know when the switch is officially happening!

Onward.