Cancer, not cancer, cancer?

I know it seems like things should be evening out.

I’ve been hesitant to share this last piece because I still don’t have an answer. The Friday before last, yes Oct. 13th, while on my way to celebrate not having cancer in my chest, LA called and said that they aren’t sure the right lymph mode was biopsied.

<Reminder that I had this procedure for locally in Oregon and LA reviewed the results and gathered this info>

However, the nurse was just calling to reschedule another EBUS. So, when I (nicely) lost it over what that meant for me, she had no answers.

That was OVER a week ago! They needed to ‘touch base’ with the doctor and ask. Despite my multiple calls and messages, I still don’t have an answer on that. Today she called and wants to schedule me an appointment, but since I don’t live in CA, we’re back to that whole scheduling mess. I asked if he could just call me to explain. She ‘sent a note.’

So, whether there is cancer in my chest too is still up for debate, apparently.

I can’t tell you how difficult this rollercoaster of a week has been. Western medicine gives zero regard to the actual humans it treats.

On the positive side, we met another surgeon in Portland just to have a backup. It took two months to get this appointment. We really liked her, but she wants more tests and I have no idea what the scheduling calendar there looks like either.

At this point, it’s basically a terrible game to see who can get me in first.

After that appointment, I took a couple days off and we spent it on the beautiful Oregon coast. Jeremy fished for his birthday and I was able to chill as much as my brain could allow. It was really nice except Jeremy started feeling sick on Thursday and when we got home, he tested positive for covid.

I tell ya, when it rains, it pours.

Gratefully, effective though he’s a first timer, his symptoms are just flu-y. I still tested negative today. Fingers crossed that I stay that way.

I’m really honestly trying to keep things together. Unfortunately my body isn’t handling this all well either. I’m not sleeping and cry uncontrollably at the most random things.

Let it out, I say. I have plenty to purge.