Up, down, and all around!

“Our goal should be to live life in radical amazement . . . to get up in the morning and look at the world in a way that takes nothing for granted. Everything is phenomenal; everything is incredible; never treat life casually. To be spiritual is to be amazed.”

-Abraham Joshua Herschel

I am definitely amazed at how strange this week has been. Maybe mercury has jumped out of retrograde and high-taled it out of the solar system.

My colleague is on vacation for the week and I am covering for her. When we met to go over some things, she focused on one project that is of high importance for the company and it didn’t seem too bad. As Monday hits, I realize she failed to mention the other 19 or so projects that are flying at me from mulitple directions! I’m trying my best to keep up and stay on top of everything, but goodness! There is a big learning curve and I haven’t been this busy in a while. Only one more day.

I also had an incident with my car and the garage. Everyone is ok, thank goodness, but ugh. I was sick about it all night but refused to berate myself (as I normally would). I just kept reminding myself it happened and that’s what is and all I can do now is to deal with it. The worst part is, I was trying to take Zie to Smith Rock instead of having a drink after a whirlwind day of work. Damn it, I was trying to do the right thing! Gratefully, Jeremy was able to fix everything and get it back in working order after some advice from our body mechanic friend.

Nonetheless that evening, I kept having waves of doom- a combination of fear, shame, anger, and all the things. Then in the middle of the night, I woke up with a strange chest pain that I have never felt before. It was a little alarming, given my history, so I nudged Jeremy and we assessed the situation. I assumed it was a combination of the doom and some strange kind of indigestion. He went back to sleep and I eventually did after a bit. Luckily I woke up feeling fine the next morning, which really makes you realize how every day is precious.

Tuesday we went to watch the sunset at Smith Rock to make up for the day prior. It was cold but beautiful. Here is the awe that’s available to us at the moment.

Today I had my osteoporosis appointment in Bend and then went to the store and gathered a whole bag of groceries, only to realize I didn’t have my wallet cause I had left it in my hiking pack after Smith Rock! sigh.

I blame my period for making me feel like I’m losing my mind. It finally came a week and a half late so I guess that dose change hasn’t quite done the trick. I don’t get blood work til May so I’ll find out then, but I’m guessing they are going to lower it again. Cramps are stupid.

Oh the best thing also happened this week. I entered Jeremy as a candidate for a free housecleaning for staying with me after heart failure and cancer and they thought it was ‘compelling’ and he won! They will do floors and bathrooms, and I am ECSTATIC for the help! Yay Jeremy!

Goes to show that everything balances out, and hopefully I’ll be able to be far more present going forward.